We are nearing the 6month mark of having Biruk.
I have a whole 'nother post swirling around in my head for the 6 Month Home post :)
I have a whole 'nother post swirling around in my head for the 6 Month Home post :)
but I wanted to document this day.
For the first 3 months home Biruk wanted nothing to do with Ethiopia ~he refused to speak Amharic, didn't want to have pics of his family up let alone even look at them in an album, didn't want to eat Ethiopian food, didn't want to play soccer, and didn't want to talk about life back in Ethiopia.
Around the 3month mark he started talking a little bit about memories he had ...they were scary, yucky memories...no wonder he didn't really want to talk about them.
About a month ago he said he'd eat injera again...and that maybe he missed doro wat. :)
About 2 weeks ago he got out his pictures of his family and he told us about everyone. Some more scary memories were revealed. *sigh*
Today something triggered him....I pulled him into our bedroom and just held and rocked him on our bed as he sobbed and sobbed.
He's been trying to be such a strong boy.
but today, thru his tears, he nodded his head when I asked him "sweetie, do you miss Ethiopia?" "do you miss your first mommy? do you miss your grandma?"
From the very first day home we've tried to make certain he knew it was OK to grieve...it was OK to miss his family and friends back there....today he finally felt comfortable to admit his heart ache.
and my heart aches for him.
I have a feeling this is only the tip of the iceberg as he now feels safe enough to grieve. We can't imagine how hard it must have been to leave his family (it is very clear he was deeply loved and probably even spoiled a bit!)....to trust us and just come with us to this new world, new family, new experiences.....
he is one brave little boy....who is working thru his grief and adjusting to his new life.
For the first 3 months home Biruk wanted nothing to do with Ethiopia ~he refused to speak Amharic, didn't want to have pics of his family up let alone even look at them in an album, didn't want to eat Ethiopian food, didn't want to play soccer, and didn't want to talk about life back in Ethiopia.
Around the 3month mark he started talking a little bit about memories he had ...they were scary, yucky memories...no wonder he didn't really want to talk about them.
About a month ago he said he'd eat injera again...and that maybe he missed doro wat. :)
About 2 weeks ago he got out his pictures of his family and he told us about everyone. Some more scary memories were revealed. *sigh*
Today something triggered him....I pulled him into our bedroom and just held and rocked him on our bed as he sobbed and sobbed.
He's been trying to be such a strong boy.
but today, thru his tears, he nodded his head when I asked him "sweetie, do you miss Ethiopia?" "do you miss your first mommy? do you miss your grandma?"
From the very first day home we've tried to make certain he knew it was OK to grieve...it was OK to miss his family and friends back there....today he finally felt comfortable to admit his heart ache.
and my heart aches for him.
I have a feeling this is only the tip of the iceberg as he now feels safe enough to grieve. We can't imagine how hard it must have been to leave his family (it is very clear he was deeply loved and probably even spoiled a bit!)....to trust us and just come with us to this new world, new family, new experiences.....
he is one brave little boy....who is working thru his grief and adjusting to his new life.
11 comments:
Poor baby. What a strong and brave boy he is.
You are a good mommy.
Bless his little 'hurt' heart.
Prayers!
Oh, sweet boy! My heart aches for all these amazing ones go through at such a young age. Extra hugs to you both!
Jen
Thanks for posting this update. You've made my heart ache as well. But the heartache serves to motivate me to pray even more for you and your family.
I'm so grateful that Biruk has a loving, understanding mommy who will let him grieve and comfort him as his tears flow.
Oh this breaks my heart! So hard for little B and so heartbreaking for you as he shares those early, difficult memories.
But how wonderful that he is comfortable enough in your family to begin to bring you into his heart. Trust is being built and it means you are giving him exactly what he needs.
I will pray for you and B through this time. That you will continue to be a blessing and a comfort to each other.
:)
Oh Jeanette, thank goodness you understand that the poor thing does need to grieve and not just try to hide his pain.
Praying for his precious heart.
Aww, what a brave boy! And a good mommy! I am glad he feels safe enough to finally grieve. Bless his sweet heart.
Praying for you my sweet friend and your little boy! Katrina
Bless his heart! I'm so glad he feels safe and loved and comfortable enough to finally share that with you at last. Praying for his tender heart.
So sad Biruk is grieving but like you said it's good because now the healing is beginning.
Jeanette-
thanks for visiting my blog. I check in to yours regularly because your son is close in age to our son in Ethiopia. . .we have referral, just waiting on fee to accept. I read this post to my hubby. Thanks for sharing. . thanks for being real. So would you email me and let me know what books you would recommend for me to read in preparation of bringing home an older child. . .ones you have read and that impacted you. I am keeping a list. Thanks!!
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